open post/overflow

[dimestore]

Comments

[dimestore]

They're nice things to say and I appreciate it
But it doesn't change anything, it doesn't make me a better person to hear it

[counterstep]

I'm not saying I have to be objectively right, but you must also realize you can't possible be objectively right either

all of this is coming from how you feel which makes it subjective as a basis

[dimestore]

Never said I was right and being told one thing but knowing myself is another
I can't believe myself into a better person
I can only help to mitigate the shit I've done by helping

[counterstep]

okay

sorry for badgering you about it
I'll get out of your hair

[dimestore]

You're just trying to help and I don't know if I can be helped
But I respect you, Bucky and what you say means something to me

[counterstep]

the only person who can change your mind is you
but if you don't know, how can you know otherwise if you don't at least try?

that's what I think anyway

[dimestore]

Don't even know where I'd start

[counterstep]

well
you can start by thinking you CAN be helped

and see how that shifts things around

[dimestore]

If I start will you get off my back?

[counterstep]

and here I thought you wanted me to take you from behind

[dimestore]

[ it is several long moments before john replies. ]

Now who's the pervert?

[counterstep]

hey, had to get back at you at some point
it's only fair 🙂

[dimestore]

Didn't think you had it in you, Barnes

[counterstep]

please
like I let people get something like that out of me first thing

[dimestore]

Are you admitting to playing hard to get?

[counterstep]

that would imply I plan on getting with anyone at all, so no

but I don't play all my cards at once
that's all

[dimestore]

Why not?

[counterstep]

because I'm not who people think I am

[dimestore]

Don't you think people deserve a chance to learn?

[counterstep]

I don't think you realize how many people approach me at random and expect me to be their best friend just cause they know my name


( ...you did this too, john. remember? )

[dimestore]

[ yeah, well, he learned his fucking lesson didn't he? he won't do that again. ]

That's not what I mean. Don't you deserve the chance for someone to know you?
Olivia might not like me anymore but she knew me and there was something comforting in that

[counterstep]

why would I deserve something like that?

[dimestore]

Because you're you and you deserve that kind of feeling

[counterstep]

what??


because I'm me is exactly why I don't
there's still a lot to make up for

[dimestore]

[ damn... they're kinda just same, aren't they? there's a pause and then: ] If I need to try for myself, I think you do too because when I look at you I don't see anything to make up for
But you seem to think I'm an ok person
Only seems fair we try for ourselves, right?